Thursday, September 24, 2015

An Average Sri Lankan House Wife.




If I ever liked or loved to a murder that is only Rodian Romanavich Rascolnicov,That’s  the main character  in Crime and Punishment by  Fyodor Dostoyevsky . It does not mean that I like killing someone at any circumstance but I have an enigmatic love over Rodian. Fyodor Dostoyevsky‘s works are marked by a preoccupation with Christianity, explored through the prism of the individual confronted with life's hardships and beauty. Even with that I can’t understand the intention of killing someone.But inexplicably I m very much attached to him.over and over time to time I do read.Looking for him.
But in Sri Lanka   I don’t think everyone feel the same way like me.what we hear is look like a worst nightmares. We Sri Lankans now killing each other.we did it for 30 years and now we have started killing our neighbors. I can’t understand what it is going on. In prison over 1000 in raw to be executed. This is all killing someone else. What about those who committed suicide. In Sri Lanka it’s a crime? But we don’t have law abiding citizens. We have the highest rate of commit suicide in the world.
Some cases there is no a particular reason, very recently there was an incident the husband who works in abroad was talking with his wife who was living in Sri Lanka. Somehow the skype conversation did not go smoothly. The wife suddenly decided to commit suicide and hang herself while the poor husband was looking through Skype. Believe this is a true story. This look very strange, but I don’t think it is a sudden decision, frustration of long term dull domestic life might have turned into an explosion.
Even as a very confused teenager I have got the intention of commit suicide in few occasions. With careful observation of my mother and regular counseling in “Sumithrayo “ I was able to survive so far.Now I don’t think that I will ever turn back towards that moronic decision.

But last week I was on the process of reconciliation with my memory, simply because I went to watch the Prasana Withanage’s new movie Oba Nathuwa Oba Ekka (With You, Without You).This is a Sri Lankan adaptation of novella “A Gentle Creature” by Fyodor Dostoyevsky, Like Crime and Punishment   the story starts from a pawnbroker. Selvi who was frequent visitor to the shop and an orphan of the war.  They married they as per the narrator in the novella it explains the proposing was an attempt of triumph over her sad miserable life. 

“Besides, I had no fears then: I knew that the fat shopkeeper was anyway more repulsive to her than I was, and that I, standing at the gate, had appeared as a deliverer. I understood that, of course. Oh, what is base a man understands particularly well! But was it base? How can a man judge? Didn't I love her even then?”-A Gentle Creature
 But they married and some extent they shared   both good and bad moments like any relationship but finally Selvi made her decision. But her decision was only reason that made husband to think about her.
But when I was reading novella A gentle Creature I felt it as a love story, May be not like Devdas, who killed himself up on love but it was instead of fulfilling romantic ideals, it portrayed a battleground. Instead of a tale of mutual happiness through mutual submission, it told of a power struggle between the husband and wife. Despite the fact that the husband possesses all of the story’s narrative time, it is his wife who, through her death, eventually won the battle. From the beginning of the story the husband tried controlling her. but what is worth wining something over a death of your own, In the movie it shown in bit straight forward way than the novella.May be I did not feel that way, either way husband did try controlling her  very much.

We could be very helpless due to various reasons, specially in front  of your husband   or partner  very difficult to face it.but  even we are helpless can we accept over powering control always throughout the life?
Well in such situation we have two options, if we are strong enough we can walk  away. Otherwise we have to follow the Selvi.In very literal way what Selvi did may be correct. Well the novella explains it and convinced the reader  but in the movie?Well i should not have looked at the movie through the novella.

 But again I  am worrying.

In Prasanna Withanage’s point this movie is an attempt of exploring the masculinity. But I watched this with my mother. She has not read the novella and she did not see noticeable masculinity of the husband, except the limitation of their expenses for 300 RS per day.

Even she did not consider it as an attempt of over powering as in the novella she considers it as a good future plan.Being economical does not mean that we should live In Sri Lankan context it is a very common that husbands not attending to Sunday service or temple as a habitual action. People like my mother will never see it as a strong masculinity attempt.
This is a country which has higher rate of domestic violence, due to adultery and use of alcohol. The film does not show any of these so even husbands did not encourage wife to dance with the maid or singing it’s not a huge issue.

People need to have certain level of understanding  to consider other reasons apart from above mentioned.the long term believe in most of Sri Lankan housewives are if the husband provides accommodation ,food and clothes they are willing to live without complain. But there is a certain level who demands something more than that. Even 100 years ago Russian house wives have had social life. They go to theaters often they have some sort of domestic maid helping with household. In Sri Lanka if housewives had some social life most cases at the temple. Or else rarely movies. We never had theaters on every town basis. The Russian adaptation might not well fitted in

That may be the reason watching move only giving the idea that Selvi made her decision based on trivial matters for average Sri Lankan house wife. Well again how can I explain an average Sri Lankan House wife. I‘ll try it somewhere in future.

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